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Post by Deleted on Aug 14, 2020 13:05:39 GMT
The wise man knows he knows fuck all. Ancient Chinese proverb Quoted from local chinese take away in Edinburgh.
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Post by daveythefatboy on Aug 14, 2020 14:07:26 GMT
At a very basic level, we seek validation. All human rituals are about that. Birthdays, funerals, weddings, graduations, etc. They are public acknowledgements. Like that scene in the Wizard of Oz where the wizard gives them a diploma, testimonial and medal in place of a brain, heart and courage. We only believe something about ourself when we see it validated through the eyes of someone else.
Identity is pretty ephemeral. It takes a lot of will to believe something about yourself if nobody treats you as if what you believe is true.
***he said, giving his opinion on the Internet ***
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Post by sloopjohnc on Aug 14, 2020 15:01:49 GMT
Well, it's interesting. I work in a profession that has some rules about how to get things done, how to show them, and how to say them, but lot's of marketing messaging is subjective.
For example: I'm having a rotating home page banner done that links to an article one of our product director's wrote. I have to think of a headline, subheadline, and background images that reflect the topics and online publication.
I know the basics, but my graphic designer were laughing this morning, that no matter what it looks like, our boss is going to change it.
Would I like him to simply sign off and say "great job?" Sure, but I've resigned myself that ain't the way it's going to be.
With opinions, we want other people to think we're as right as we think we are. Simple as that. Davey called that vaildation. I guess so.
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Post by daveythefatboy on Aug 14, 2020 16:52:31 GMT
I work in hospice. I train people to act as companions to dying people. Most of the patients we serve have dementia - a good portion so severe that they’ve lost the ability to use language.
When a human being is broken down to a place that elemental, you really have to think hard about what they might want from another person. Loneliness is clearly a problem, and there exists reams of data to suggest that their health outcomes degrade badly when left alone.
But why? Why does it matter to them to have other humans around when they can’t talk with them, or even know who they are?
From a biological perspective, I’m told that loneliness is destructive - even on a cellular level. That the human animal cut off from others in prehistoric times could not survive, and thus could not feel safe unless they were assured of being part of a tribe.
Validation is the process of being assured that one is seen and included. It can take form in a lot of ways - spouting off on an Internet forum, or having someone sit with you and match your breathing. But ultimately it is all the same need. We don’t want to be abandoned to the cold.
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Post by sloopjohnc on Aug 14, 2020 17:36:45 GMT
I wish human beings weren't as complicated as we are.
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Post by sloopjohnc on Aug 14, 2020 17:39:35 GMT
From a biological perspective, I’m told that loneliness is destructive - even on a cellular level. That the human animal cut off from others in prehistoric times could not survive, and thus could not feel safe unless they were assured of being part of a tribe. Well, I agree that we're a pack animal, as it were, but I wish it was more selective. I guess that's why there's Facebook.
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Post by cousinlou on Aug 17, 2020 7:25:48 GMT
I work in hospice. I train people to act as companions to dying people. Most of the patients we serve have dementia - a good portion so severe that they’ve lost the ability to use language. When a human being is broken down to a place that elemental, you really have to think hard about what they might want from another person. Loneliness is clearly a problem, and there exists reams of data to suggest that their health outcomes degrade badly when left alone. But why? Why does it matter to them to have other humans around when they can’t talk with them, or even know who they are? From a biological perspective, I’m told that loneliness is destructive - even on a cellular level. That the human animal cut off from others in prehistoric times could not survive, and thus could not feel safe unless they were assured of being part of a tribe. Validation is the process of being assured that one is seen and included. It can take form in a lot of ways - spouting off on an Internet forum, or having someone sit with you and match your breathing. But ultimately it is all the same need. We don’t want to be abandoned to the cold. I am convinced this is all true. But why don't we stick to these basics - being there for others - but feel the need to cultivate opinions about literally anything that meets our eyes?
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